for meanttobeabeta: late September 2013
Jan. 31st, 2014 12:16 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
He's gotten used to seeing Derek every day, or at least hearing from him. A call, a text, a now-familiar set of shoulders shoving its way through his window or curled up on the floor of his room cross-legged. They make plans and cross-sections of town for search grids, discuss whatever Derek's managed to pull from Peter, argue about Stiles' latest harebrained scheme for drawing out the alpha pack. He very carefully doesn't think about how much time all those nights add up to, just like he doesn't think about the little touches and comforts and that growing sense of familiarity he feels with the taciturn older man. He carefully, deliberately doesn't mention Scott. Neither of them does.
Of course, that still doesn't mean he's expecting to see Derek leaning against his Jeep that late September afternoon as he heads out of the school and towards the parking lot. And he sure as hell isn't ready for Derek's incredibly good James Dean impersonation, swallowing heavily at the sight of tight jeans, white shirt, leather jacket and frantically stuffing every last hormone back into that overflowing box of NO in the back of his mind. The outfit just makes him more aware of his worn Avengers shirt, the slightly holey flannel, the stain on his grey hoodie from lunch. Stupid sexy Derek.
"Dude, what are you doing here? Thought you didn't want Scott knowing about all this Alpha pack stuff. You start meeting me at school, he'll have questions." Not that the lack of Stiles in his life had seemed to register so far, he thought sourly.
Of course, that still doesn't mean he's expecting to see Derek leaning against his Jeep that late September afternoon as he heads out of the school and towards the parking lot. And he sure as hell isn't ready for Derek's incredibly good James Dean impersonation, swallowing heavily at the sight of tight jeans, white shirt, leather jacket and frantically stuffing every last hormone back into that overflowing box of NO in the back of his mind. The outfit just makes him more aware of his worn Avengers shirt, the slightly holey flannel, the stain on his grey hoodie from lunch. Stupid sexy Derek.
"Dude, what are you doing here? Thought you didn't want Scott knowing about all this Alpha pack stuff. You start meeting me at school, he'll have questions." Not that the lack of Stiles in his life had seemed to register so far, he thought sourly.
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Date: 2014-02-01 11:09 am (UTC)"I smelled them," is all he says, almost a growl, as he climbs in.
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Date: 2014-02-01 06:53 pm (UTC)There's definitely more than one speculative look aimed their way as Stiles glances around furtively, digging his keys out of his pocket. The sight of anyone that looks like Derek with anyone that looks like Stiles is bound to raise some eyebrows. Luckily, he doesn't see Scott, who bolted immediately to watch Allison at some archery competition she'd mentioned earlier that week. There's a brief flash of guilt at the relief he feels, too, in not seeing Scott; despite everything, he's still Stiles' best friend, and Scott isn't the only one keeping secrets anymore. He needs to do something. Try to fix things, before Scott runs off to college and never looks back.
They're all problems for later, though, and Derek has Stiles' full attention as he opens the drivers side door and hops in, starting the engine. He doesn't even have to ask who. Only..."Where am I heading?" They're on the same page, otherwise.
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Date: 2014-02-01 10:05 pm (UTC)"The strip mall just short of the light industrial district on the north end of town. The one with that bakery that... that Erica likes."
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Date: 2014-02-02 12:35 am (UTC)The funny thing is, his social standing would probably only improve, being seen with someone like Derek. Tall, gorgeous, mysterious bad boy with a kickass car? Yeah, he could use the cred. Only there's Scott to consider, a conversation he knows is coming that he's been actively avoiding for months. Scott who shouldn't learn about things secondhand the hard way, even if he's done that to Stiles often enough for it to be a pattern. And there's his dad to consider. He still can't come up with a reason his dad will buy for why he's spending time with a twenty-something former suspect Stiles once fingered for murder. And it sucks. It isn't fair. He's tired of keeping secrets, for one, and for another Derek deserves better than that. He's not a bad guy. In fact, he's pretty damn good at keeping Stiles on track, at making him think about that vague third step in a four-part course of action that always seems to trip him up. He challenges Stiles, without condescending. Calls him an idiot while still telling him he's smart. And Stiles only really notices that five-or-six-year difference at times like this, when it shouldn't matter but does.
Not that he says any of that. Not even if he notices that muscle twitch in Derek's jaw, not even if he kind of guesses why. The way Derek looks at him, he might as well be twelve. He's human, he's underage, he's...Stiles. Just Stiles. Derek's probably irritated he has to resort to this again. Because it ended so well last time. Instead, he pulls out of the parking lot, nearly mowing down a swarm of freshmen who aren't looking where they're walking as he takes the right.
"When did you notice? You know, if you text me these things when they happen, I can cut class. Some things are more important than Harris threatening to vivisect me if I make another bad chemistry pun."
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Date: 2014-02-02 04:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-02 05:32 am (UTC)"Hey, I resent that. Some jokes just beg to be made, it's not my fault if my audience is unappreciative." He can feel that skeptical, sidelong look Derek gives him, and isn't intimidated by it in the slightest. It's been too long since the last time Derek shoved him into something.
"A couple hours, though? No luck with traces? It has to be intentional. Why now? They've been quiet for months. There anything special about this place? There has to be something, if this is the first time they're doing anything." He's babbling, he knows, but it's like he's been spinning his wheels for months now without getting anywhere. And finally, there's something. Anything, definitely better than nothing.
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Date: 2014-02-02 08:25 pm (UTC)"Nothing. Just right fucking there. On the door handle. Nowhere else. At least a day old, maybe two. And I don't fucking know why, that's why I came for you." Which isn't strictly true. It's obvious that they're doing it to taunt him, he just doesn't know why.
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Date: 2014-02-03 12:14 am (UTC)Stiles would argue that in school is possibly the best place to exercise his humor, for a variety of reasons. It's all one big joke, he might say, or if he doesn't laugh he's going to lose his mind. Really, it's just because he can't not. It's been a defense reflex for so long now, he doesn't even really have full control of it. But hey, he only has to survive another nine months without flunking or getting expelled. Or dying. He can manage that, right?
The industrial park isn't that far away, and Stiles knows where he's going. He doesn't even glance over at Derek, just watching his rearview mirror. "Hey, ease off. I didn't know if you'd heard anything else from Peter. How's everyone's favorite sociopath taking the news? He thinking of trying to take your mojo back?" It's a disturbing possibility, but still one made more likely by the presence of an alpha pack, and fear is making Stiles more mouthy by proxy.
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Date: 2014-02-03 10:10 pm (UTC)"If he wasn't too weak to take on anyone stronger than you right now I'm sure he would be," he snarls in return. It's not something he likes to think about, that Peter, even as screwed up as he is, might choose to kill him for his power, the way he'd killed Laura. He wants him to be getting better, but he can't afford to even hope, let alone expect for it to happen. "But right now he's more interested in not dying a second time, permanently, than in actively trying to fuck me over."
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Date: 2014-02-04 02:00 pm (UTC)The hurt look on Stiles' face is palpable. That not-so-subtle jab hits home, especially now while he's already feeling particularly insignificant. He's never been the strongest kid. Didn't matter as long as he had his brains, his mom used to insist when he was little, a foot shorter and twenty pounds lighter than his entire class. He'd all but caught up, height-wise, but still barely registered as anything more than scrawny. Even without factoring in the wolfiness, he would never have the body Derek did. And he would never have the wolfiness. The thought still gave him the heebie-jeebies, attractive and repellent all at the same time.
But he has his brains, and that's why he holds his tongue for a minute, parking at the back of the lot in front of the coffee shop. Before he opens his door, he looks over at Derek. "Look, I shouldn't have said that. But don't go ripping my head off, figuratively or literally, okay? I might just be a stupid, loudmouthed kid but I'm trying to help. Because the two of them don't deserve to have that happen again." Slamming the door behind him, he heads for the door of the coffee shop, irritated at himself for starting it and at Derek for answering. He really needed to start thinking before he opened his mouth. Derek wasn't Scott. He wasn't his best friend. He didn't give Stiles free passes. He needed to remember that.
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Date: 2014-02-04 07:17 pm (UTC)He takes a slow, deep breath, then climbs out himself, letting the door fall shut behind him. "No, they don't." He can't quite bring himself to apologize; maybe he did exhaust his capacity for that after dealing with the fae, maybe he's just too damn angry and worn right now. Either way, an apology's not coming this time, but he looks at least slightly abashed.
He nods towards the coffee shop, and his expression shifts to a more characteristic scowl. "Just the door, nowhere else. Their scent and... and at least one alpha's. Together." He pauses, mouth going thin and tight. "And fear. They smelled like fear."
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Date: 2014-02-05 01:14 am (UTC)It's a step in the right direction. Derek doesn't outright apologize, but neither does Stiles, and he does follow Stiles, looking at least a little more subdued. Maybe he just needs to keep being that blunt with Derek. Maybe that's what it takes. No time to say anything, though, especially not as those last words send a visible chill down his spine. Fear. No, if there was anything Stiles could do, he had to. He couldn't not.
"Okay." He nods, then nods again, trying to breathe all his jitters away. One breath in, one breath out, and he wipes his palms against his jeans, straightening his too-large shirt as he nods one more time. "That's what we've got, time to see what else we can find. You, uh...us coming in together together is bound to raise some questions, dude. You wanna go ahead in? I'll follow, see if I can get anything from Melissa and we can meet back up outside in ten." He doesn't want to split up, knows what Derek is gonna think about it, but he'll focus better without a looming, scowling Derek, and Derek might be able to pick up on something weird and wolfy without Stiles distracting him.
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Date: 2014-02-05 06:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 01:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-09 07:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-12 05:22 am (UTC)If Stiles'eyebrows were already at maximum loft before Derek starts speaking, by the time he's done they've crawled their way right off Stiles' face, bought jetpacks, and flown to the moon. He asked. And was banned. Yeah, he can imagine just how Derek 'asked.' The guy's powers of persuasion could be pretty impressive. Downright spooky, even; even now Stiles remembered that smile from that night at the police station. But ask him to remember that charm, to try that before intimidation? Might as well ask the Earth to spin counterclockwise.
Shaking his head, and resisting the urge to sigh or roll his eyes, Stiles just nods and heads inside. There's a minute or two where he leans on the counter, talking to the girl behind it, smiling, and maybe surprisingly, she smiles back. After another moment, he scribbles something on a receipt and hands it to her, and she nods, waving as Stiles walks out. His trip back to Derek is short, and he shoves his hands back into his pockets.
"No dice. She didn't see Erica or Boyd, but there were some new people in this morning. Doesn't remember them, otherwise, other than one of them having killer biceps, which is totally helpful in a lineup, I'm sure. But I don't know, something just...feels weird. About all of this. You wanna hit up the rest of the usual spots? I just, I dunno. There's something weird." He falls back on repeating, shaking his head and fishing for his keys. Something is rotten in the state of California. So to speak.
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Date: 2014-02-13 04:16 am (UTC)"Of course it's weird. Their scent's no place but the door handle. Not inside, not down the street, not like they came and left in a car, like... like someone just rubbed their scent on the door and walked away," he rumbles, turning and bouncing a fist off the hood of the jeep. "They're taunting me." He stops, head bowed and breathing shallow as he tries to get himself back under control--it's definitely not hard to see why he was banned from the shop earlier. "Yes. Let's... anywhere they went regularly. Anywhere they... they like." Not liked. Not past tense, because they're not dead.
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Date: 2014-02-16 05:42 pm (UTC)Stiles can't help a wince as Derek hits the hood of the Jeep. It's his baby, his only mode of transportation, and he's seen Derek put his fist through solid walls. "Of course they're trying to get to you. Obviously they're trying to get you angry and off-balance, and it's working. So chill, okay? Going around punching my ride isn't gonna help find them, and I'm gonna have a hell of a time explaining a fist-shaped dent in the hood to my dad."
Still, he's moving without argument, sliding into the driver's seat and turning the key. He's already got a sneaking suspicion what they're going to find everywhere they go: Boyd's house, Erica's, the ice rink, school, the comic shop...all scented. On purpose. And he still knows next to nothing about the alpha pack. With that and Derek's natural inclination for running headlong into danger, he was feeling really optimistic about their odds. Really.
Pulling out, he looks over at Derek again. "You hear anything useful from Peter?"
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Date: 2014-02-17 10:41 am (UTC)"What if it helps to keep me from punching you?" Derek snarls, but it's half-hearted at best and he's pulling open the passenger side door as he speaks. "When has Peter ever said anything useful?" he asks, not meeting Stiles' eyes. To someone who knows him and pays attention it's fairly obvious he's being evasive.
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Date: 2014-02-17 03:30 pm (UTC)Stiles waits for his body to react to that snarl, waits to feel scared or intimidated or at the very least irritated, but...yeah, he's got nothing, and that's probably the biggest indicator he has of just how much things have changed between them. He doesn't think Derek will hurt him. That doesn't mean he thinks Derek won't smack him upside the head, especially if he deserves it, but...he's put too much effort into keeping Stiles safe. The threats are just his way of covering.
So he just gives Derek a sideways look, not even dignifying the threat with an answer. Besides, Derek himself is more interesting right now. Shoulders hunched, eyes turned down, voice almost defensive--
"When it'll hurt someone, when it's totally useless, when it's annoying, when it'll make him giggle. Take your pick. He's more bigass cat than werewolf, a pain just because he can be. What did he tell you?" Because he may not be a were-anything, but he can smell a secret, Derek, and you should know his persistence by now.
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Date: 2014-02-19 09:35 am (UTC)"He said they're here because they want me to join them." He'd been assuming they wanted to kill him. Challenge him for his territory--not for his pack, obviously, it's not really even big enough to qualify. But if they want him to join up.... He squeezes his eyes shut. There's no trusting Peter. None.
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Date: 2014-02-21 12:57 pm (UTC)Stiles frowns, thinking. "But if you join them, what happens to--your betas?" He'd almost said us. That would be crazy. If he was anyone's beta, he'd be Scott's. Right? But he wasn't, so...the question still stands. "It doesn't make sense. You can't join a pack if you already have one."
And then it clicks, and his blood runs cold, because half of Derek's pack is gone already, and guess who's responsible? He can't let this keep going. Not if he can just think fast enough to find them. His foot on the gas pushes harder, and he nearly scrapes the side of the Jeep on the curb as he pulls up to their next stop. They just have to find them. There is no other option.
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Date: 2014-02-22 05:20 pm (UTC)"At least... if Peter's right, at least we know it's not just wishful thinking and they're still alive." Because it won't accomplish what the Alphas want unless he kills them himself. It's not all that reassuring.
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Date: 2014-02-23 12:01 am (UTC)There's a part of Stiles that does consider himself Derek's. Not in a pack sense, at least not on purpose or in so many words, but there's a bond. He thinks it's friendship, at least potentially, something born of the innate trust you have to have to consider someone important. They've saved each other's lives often enough for it to be a thing. He trusts Derek, nearly implicitly, might even like his company just for its own sake if weird and life-threatening things ever stop happening. Like that's even a remote possibility. But is that pack? He doesn't know.
What he does know is that there's something off about Derek's words, something a part of him mind latches on to like a terrier with a bone as he turns the key in the ignition. "Wait, how would that make them safer? If they have to be out of the way first, in order for you to join up, then...I dunno. What exactly did Peter say?" There's something Derek isn't saying. Something he doesn't want to say. And that means Stiles has to hear it.
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Date: 2014-02-23 10:44 am (UTC)Derek should have known Stiles wouldn't just leave that statement alone, and so he should have kept his mouth shut. It's too late now, though, and he wishes he were driving, so that he had a reason not to look at Stiles, and something to occupy his attention. He doesn't, though, and he looks at Stiles sidelong for a few seconds before answering.
"Remember when Peter was the Alpha?" Maybe Stiles will make the logical leap on his own, remember how Peter had been trying to make Scott kill his own 'pack', and at least Derek won't have to say it out loud.
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Date: 2014-02-23 02:54 pm (UTC)"How could I forget? Running, screaming, multiple murders. Good times," is his almost absent sarcastic retort, but he's thinking, and thinking hard. So much of that early time was colored by his fear, by his worry for Scott, by jealousy and loss and the terrifying thing that not knowing can be. But he thinks. When Peter was alpha. Being offered the bite, but that isn't the relevant part. Why wouldn't Erica and Boyd be dead yet? If someone else had to do the deed.
There's a look of horrified realization on his face, but it's followed swiftly by relief. "They clearly have no idea what they're doing, then," he says, opening his door to climb out. "You'd never do that to us." The us is unintentional, but he isn't thinking about that. Just about Derek, and how he'd die for his pack. Not the other way around. Never that. Derek wouldn't let it happen.
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Date: 2014-02-24 09:44 am (UTC)"No," he agrees, low and steady and with absolute conviction. Because he wouldn't. There's no way in hell that's happening. "But for now it means I've been right, and they're alive." Not safe, because there's nothing safe about this, but alive. "And we can get them back."
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Date: 2014-02-24 02:10 pm (UTC)He already knew Derek wouldn't, but hearing him say it with that clear conviction is more reassuring than words can say. The image he has of Derek as he is is still fairly fresh, only a few months old, and apparently there's still some parts of him that need that reassuring. "Yeah," he agrees. "We can. We will."
All it takes is looking, to notice the kinds of things Stiles does. Most people just glance and let their assumptions fill in the blanks. But Stiles, he really looks at things, and the same thing that makes him so irritating to most people is actually his biggest strength. He's persistent and observant, and these few hours spent with Derek scoring the town for more traces of Erica and Boyd have given him plenty to think about. The look on Derek's face as he's gone from scent to scent, place to place. The subtle hints of someone else's hand at work, something about the locations they've found traces of scent at. Something he can't quite place yet, as he climbs back into the Jeep after the last one, head against the steering wheel for one long moment. "Well, at least we know the scent wasn't accidental. It's been everywhere. You have anything? Because right now, anything would be good." He's tired, and frustrated, and lunch seems like a thousand years ago. He could really go for tacos right now.
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Date: 2014-02-25 08:13 am (UTC)"Nothing fucking useful," he growls, frustration and rage vibrating across every word. "The other wolf scents were never distinctive or clear enough to get a lock on, and they changed, but I'm not even fucking sure how many times, or how many might be in the Alpha back, other than at least three and probably less than ten." Jesus, please let it be less than ten. Less than five would be even better.
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Date: 2014-02-26 01:12 am (UTC)He doesn't even realize he's reaching across the seat until there's the feel of leather under his fingertips, leather over solid, practically vibrating muscle. His fingers squeeze reflexively, as the first (and likely smartest) part of his brain tells him to stop and tries to prepare for the inevitable backlash. It's different when it's Derek touching him, or invading his personal space, or when Stiles accidentally touches Derek. This is deliberate, and he can't really figure out why he did it.
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Date: 2014-02-27 09:33 pm (UTC)"Yeah," he rumbles after a moment, making himself look away again. "We just have to keep looking, we'll find them." And hopefully not die with them.
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Date: 2014-02-28 04:48 am (UTC)There's a brief second of tense silence, as Derek looks down at Stiles' hand on his arm, and Stiles waits for whatever happens next. Imagine his surprise when instead of jerking away, or pushing Stiles off, instead he just...agrees. And maybe it's Stiles' admittedly overactive imagination, but Derek sounds a little more in control, a little less likely to be shifting in the front seat of the Jeep. Which is good, because Stiles has no idea how he'd explain that kind of damage to anyone.
His hand tightens just a little more on Derek's arm before falling away, and both of them seem a little more in control after that point of contact. He doesn't think about why. Maybe Derek just needed to be reminded that he wasn't in this alone, even if Stiles isn't that much help. He's only human, after all. Human and starving, as his stomach chooses this moment to chime in loudly, gurgling loud enough to be clearly audible in the silence. He at least has the good grace to look embarrassed. "So what's next?"